Category: Teen Topics
This is really not just a teenage issue, I've had these conversations with middle
agers like I am, elders, and others also. But I bring this up to hopefully
stimulate some discussion.
It's hard for many of us who are your parents' age to remember that unlike us,
you guys are growing up online. Most of us your parents age got to grow up and
be young fools without a permanent record of it, all or most our mistakes
washed away with time.
I bring this up to hopefully help young people, in the midst of normal teenage
and 20-something angst, to consider the type of information you post online,
especially if that information can be directly tracked to you personally. I mean
sites like Facebook and Twitter and others.
There are cases where people have lived to regret what is called "twitter
outrage", after a fit of "righteous" rage against a person or entity, based entirely
on false information. That information was retweeted or shared with them from
friends or folks they thought they knew. Those people got it from somewhere
else that is a pseudo-news-source, basically a sexed-up blog, with no sources to
back it. This has, and can, result in actual court cases of slander and libel.
Again, I would be lying to you if I said I knew the answers. When my own
daughter was still under our roof, I just urged caution. Not panic, not fear, just
caution and being circumspect about what to put online and where.
This isn't your typical how to, I just want to stimulate conversation on this
issue. Because while youngers forget and post stuff they later regret, we, your
parents' age, often forget that life has got to be really different now when you're
basically "growing up online."
Criticize this topic, talk about it, do what you will, so long as people are thinking
about it.
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Two words to make one seriously paranoid - Pink Meth.
On a lighter note, yes, we need tyo give very serious consideration about what we want others to know about us. This is a vastly connected world now. The internet has ever been so, but it has grown in leaps and bounds over the past ten years or so. We have apps which track and report where we are and what we're doing. We have things like Google Maps, old though it might be. There's a lot to consider, whether you're young or old. Identity theft is a real issue, though the majority of us will likely never experience it. As one can glean from my profile, I'm generally not all that private. But - and I'm not trying to be self-depricating here, I've also got little to no online following. Come to think of it I probably should be more careful.
There's also the sociological and ethical issues of one's online persona versus their real-world persona. Personally I make no differentiation myself between the person I am online and in real life, though I did to a smaller degree when I first started using the internet back in 2001. I realize I'm probably in the minority here though. Either that or the world really is full of nasty people.I'll say this though, ananimity has its place, but it makes people act in really nasty ways at times.
In the words of a cop who came and did a cyber security awareness presentation at my university, "The only other search engine that is best second to google is facebook."
I have posted about this, because I looked at profiles and people put addresses, telephone numbers and everything on them
When filling out a profile lie? Lol
Yes, sites like Facebook are the most common for searches. Not because they
are databases of information, but because people search their friends' posts for
things, or post something out to their friends and try to glean information that
way.
Glad people are talking about this, hopefully it makes people ponder before they
wander.
I really believe people enjoy people knowing about them.
Think of all the Tweets and such about what people are doing, and exactly were.
We have apps that share our locations, and you name it.
Why are these apps so popular?
Maybe they make the world feel like a village?
I think they are popular because half of us are narcisists and the other half are voyeurs.
you know, putting your address and phone number on fb is an optional extra, right? meaning, you don't have to.
I tend to think Wayne is more correct than anything.
We want community.
I remember being younger when there was no social networking, and the old
folks would talk about how much better it had been in a small town, word of
mouth, people knowing everyone. In those days, I thought it was just old
people talk. Someone else, or rather someone elses, figured out that this need
for community could be commoditized.
I don't really think it's narcissistic, even though I make fun of the millennials
doing selfies and stuff. We're all spread out, we live and work apart from friends
we've made.
But using these social networks, we are not the customers. We are the
commodity, and the advertisers are the customers. We have to make sure all of
us understand this.
This issue is certainly complicated, I just think people understanding what's
going on should help. Rather than just say "Do this," and "Don't do that," we
just need to understand how it is for us.
I think the one that really gets me is not so much people posting their own info online, but that of their kids. A lot of what Leo would call the 20 something crowd, or sometimes young people in their late teens, are now having children. And they're posting all kinds of info about their children on FB. Pictures of the child doing or saying embarrassing things, stuff that you know the kid would not want posted online once they were older. It can also be a safety issue. I've seen parents posting where their kids are at a given time without them. If someone wants to be an idiot with their own info, that's their choice. But I get mad when I see parents being stupid with their kid's info, and the kid has no choice about it.
Yes, vary silly indeed. I don't know why social sites don't make a rule on that.
Maybe because the parent is responsible, they don't set the bar.
The thing is, how would those sites police that if they did try to make such a rule? How would you enforce that, especially with the number of users those sites have? It's like the Zone, the site is not the user's parents, or grandparents of their children.
True.
Alicia's right. And I did not do so when She was under age, not without her
consent. I explained why, even when she thought that was "weird" and
"awkward" and all the other names they got for things. But I did this for her
safety.. Also as a means to help her think about such things, including what
others will or should not post about her online.
And lol Alicia, we were called "twenty-something" in the 90s so that's where I
got that term. *smile*
I will continue to post Matilda's pics and actions online, for the main reason that, if I didn't, my friends and family would have nothing to do with her. I live in Sweden. most of my friends and family live in Austrailia. I hope she understands that when she is older. I of course will never post anything for her own friends to see.
You guys don't know how serious this is. I will never tell my exact location online. I have reasons, and I'm still terrified that even posting out here, this person will find me. However, I want to know how to research someone if they victimized you? Someone on this board may be able to help, but I'm scared to say who. I live with the fear that the person will find me every day. When old class mates from Primary schools know your face... I just shudder. All I can offer is my thanks, if someone knows what to do. However, I'd be very thankful.
Blessings
I always wonder why people complete and share their answers to those
quizzes/surveys that sometimes get sent round, first pet's name, favourite
whatever. Most people don't set particularly strong passwords or come up with
difficult security questions for things like the bank, and these always strike me
as an excellent repository of information for malfeasants.
I only fill out the ones that are federal, like BARD. I'm scared to even do online surveys from Safeway.
I don't know how many people fully grasped how big the internet would become, how much a part of everyday life, and how permanent, when it first got started.
I wish I hadn't used my full name, ever, but that's not because I'm fearful. Shopping online is fairly safe. I just don't appreciate nosy friends or new acquaintances Googling me, not to mention the issue for people of their employers or possible employers doing so.
I doubt I'd share info about a child, but I'm not on Facebook anyway. I haven't made the transition of feeling that the net is a primary communication method; I still prefer the phone to anything else. It's basically just the library. It's how I find information, watch TV shows, get books.
I can't tell you how glad I am that the net wasn't around when I was a teen. Good God! All the anxxt I could have spewed publically would have landed me in the nut-hutt for sure. lol I always get nervous when I see a certain group of friends from my college days posting pictures from that time on FB. I've spoken with each of them privately and asked that they not share anything embarrassing of me but there are no guarantees. lol
I feel really bad for the little kids of today when they grow up. I have a friend who posts nonstop pics of her kid. It's ridiculous, really. I wonder too if she enjoys playing with him as much as she enjoys chasing him around with a camera.
Anyway, great post, Leo. This is definitely a topic that gets discussed around here allot as my kidlet has splashed into the digital realm.
Nothing wrong with posting decent pictures for your family of your kid. It is the other type that might not be good later.
You can never tell.
thank you leo for posting. You see, I keep things secret. I don't like to share
whare I'm at or what the heck I'm doing on twitter or facebook. just things I
like... like Sia songs. I'd post them no problem. But yeah, people have to be
more careful of what they post on the Internet. (I rarely go on facebook
because of that)
Thanks for posting this. I guess as a teen myself, I get frustrated when the mention of talking to people on the internet makes adults around me worried, though I can understand why. Some people give out information on the internet, but I think it's a case of being sensible, as with anything in life really. I've grown up with the internet, so I know a lot of the risks, and they're obviously different to what my parents were experiencing as children, so I can understand their worry as well, even if the internet and people online is a regular mode of communication for me.
It's not just kids, but too many forget that what you post online is in fact for public viewing. If you think ten years later you might be embarrassed about it, maybe shouldn't post it
There is crossover, but I think the mistakes made by younger and older people, while different, are usually both mistakes of impulse online. This now so-called Twitter outrage is one very good example of such.
yep, that's true, leo. I'm too scared to post my location. I don't do it which
gives me a relief. :) but others... they post their location and what the hell
they're doing every single day. Aren't they scared that someone might find
them and do something to them? just a thought.
I always tell people a rule of thumb is if you'd not post it at the mall on the wall, don't post it online. Lol
Yes, I'm paranoid as hell as far as my privacy on Facebook is concerned.
I have my privacy settings set so that while my profile is searchable, the random
person who isn't on my friends list will not find my actual photo as my profile photo
and you sure as hell will NOT see any of the "places she's lived." You'll also not see
my relationship status, whom I may or may not be married to, my current occupation
or my friends list or any photos other than the ones that are default set public by
Facebook.
There are far too many freaks out there to make publishing such information worth it.
I've not made any reference to my FaceBook friends list in general that I'm pregnant
and for those who do know and even for those who don't know, there is no way in
Sam Hill that they can post anything to my wall/tag me in a post or do anything that
may show up on my wall without having it cleared by me first. If they make a
pregnancy related comment in a pre-existing post that I've made to my wall, they
shouldn't be surprised to see such comment(s) zapped... I've only had to do this once
so far and I hope that I'll not have to do it again any time soon.
When the baby's born in a couple of months, there will be exactly ONE announcement
about it as well a photo or two but you can be sure that the privacy settings on that
post will be set to Friends list only and there certainly will not be any future pictures
of the baby forthcoming any time soon. I will happily email/iMessage photos of the
baby on a "need to know" basis and people should be warned that I've got a pretty
strict list of criteria as to who qualifies as far as needs to know goes.
My FaceBook profile is also in my maiden name in both English and Japanese and I
have no intention of changing it to my married name any time soon.
I've done this so that I will have a certain degree of privacy and protection from
future employers and coworkers. My resume/CV is written in my married name, as
this is the name in which all of my ID documents are issued and the email address I
associate with my professional working life is not associated with my maiden name FB
account, so unless they discover what email address I've got attached to my FB
account (an obscure address that nobody is likely to know if they don't know/have it
already) and what name I go by on that account (either English or Japanese) and can
spell it correctly (my "other" name is my Japanese name and is written in Japanese
Kanji), they can't easily find me.
I'm smart enough to know that this security measure is not 100% safe from people at
work finding my profile without my knowledge and as such I'm still cautious about
what I post on my FB account - I don't generally post about stuff that happens at
work because I know that once it's out there, anything that I post can come back to
haunt me.